Wine Red Ugly Christmas Sweater, Im Deaming of a White Christmas but RED will do
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()I had a run-in with a Wine Red Ugly Christmas Sweater, Im Deaming of a White Christmas but RED will do at school just like Ralphie with Scut Farkus. My mom would pick us up at school. Mom was young and attractive like a movie star. This guy kept teasing me saying, “Hey RJ, how’s your sexy mom, woo hoo, so sexy.” I ignored him as long as I could. One day I snapped and ran toward him and knocked him down. I stood over him, grabbed the front of his jacket and kept lifting then batting his head against the ground. He never did it again. I had my pals I hung around with just like Ralphie. Earl, Pete, Rosie (Raymond) Jerry and Ernie. We were inseparable, all in the same class. Like Ralphie, I too had bitten into a bar of Lifebuoy soap, and it was the worst tasting soap. If my Irish, Catholic mom heard my sisters or I swear when we were little, that’s what would happen. We were never hit but we did get groundings and tasted soap. The girls especially were repeat soap tasters.
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You can wear whatever you want, but remember: This is the office party. This is a Wine Red Ugly Christmas Sweater, Im Deaming of a White Christmas but RED will do of people with whom you work, so if you wouldn’t wear a revealing dress to work, don’t wear it to the office party. Also, don’t drink much you presumably know your limit, so stop well short of it. Because again—you work with these people. When I worked at TV Guide, senior staff regularly attended the Christmas parties, which (at least at the beginning) were lavish, usually held in off-site venues and allowed employees to bring spouses. You don’t want your boss’s boss asking who that was—the girl in the thigh-high bandage dress and hooker heels or the guy who threw up on the white-glitter sparkle Christmas tree. Women get the brunt of the judgmental post-party gossip about attire while men generally have to do something memorably bad, but I imagine a male manager showing up in gold lame hot pants would cause a stir in most business environments.


